Beyond Fucked


Gig, videos, book release, trance

I performed my last gig, people were complimentary. Now I'll focus on doing comedy away from the stage. My text to image technology still needs some work. I won't start on text to video technology for a few weeks yet. The entire point of the text to video technology is so I can release computer generated comedy videos. Perhaps I can realistically start in March or something. The text to image technology took more fine tuning than I thought. I am currently using it to design merchandise, it just doesn't have all of the abilities that I need yet.

I have released The Confessions of a Partying Cripple. I expected more sales. I was going to write a few more nonfiction books, but now I don't know. I didn't expect to be a massive success but eh. I really just wanted to say "I wrote the book on disability and partying". It was the #1 new release for two categories and got into the top 10 in overall sales for one. I may have been obsessively checking the sales ranks. All these achievements and only 10 sales. It would be good stand up humor. It would be VERY easy to send BS sales to get a #1 spot and get the clout. I am too cheap to do this. All I am saying is based on this experience if you truly wanted BS best selling clout, it's really not that difficult to do. This is nothing new; some of the people on the New York Times list buy their own books. Maybe I'll continue writing nonfiction books in my spare time, starting again next year. I'm definitely not doing this for the money. I think I've only made $12US overall. I still want to do non comedic fiction under a pen name, again not for the money. I'd be utterly delusional if that was my only motivation.

I was thinking about comedic fiction books. I think YouTube videos would earn more money. I could put some of the money back into videos and produce more and better content. I envision revenue from merchandise would be another way to do this, but had fuck all sales. Hopefully things will build up everything. Satirical "make money online" videos would be a good place to start, the revenue would be higher and I want to make fun of these guru idiots selling people crap. I have the first animated video but I am waiting for my text to video software to complete it. Yes I should complete it sooner, I just can't be fucked operating video editing software.

I am probably going to get involved in one or two things offline too. I'm considering releasing trance mixes too. I do a lot of stuff because I really don't have a life, or partner, and I don't really like people hahaha.
Posted at 30/11/2020 21:26:40 UTC 30 comments

Comedy, Projects, Humanity

I performed twice virtually last month, enjoyed the first show more. I liked performing virtually. It just takes a while to get used to the two second delay in laughs. I don't like traveling in vans, it's an unproductive waste of time. Not having to do that was good. Oddly I'm more tolerant of traveling to other cities for concerts, which I can't do now due to fucking Coronavirus. I have a gig later in the month. Then in all likelihood I'll discontinue stand up comedy but still work on comedy projects. I actually now own a stake in an upcoming company, so I may have to seriously reduce projects going forward.

It is an Artificial Intelligence company. All I will say is there's capital behind it. Nothing major and it's been mostly spent on the technology. I hope this works out. I still want to do hobby projects such as videos, books, certain websites. I'll also do merchandise designing and some programming projects. I'll see what I can outsource/(semi) automate in my network. I'll probably get writers for my content websites.

Also, I'm kind of done with the human race right now due to a moronic referendum result and the fact that 45% of Americans would still elect a moronic crazy person. I don't like humans, and I'm not going to spend my time entertaining them, OK? I'll still release blogs, videos, books and merchandise. I just don't like humanity enough to build a career being around people, never have!
Posted at 07/11/2020 06:15:19 UTC 544 comments

Tto do lists, comedy, shirts, books

So I completed a few things on my to do list. I did comedy in drag, that set went better than expected. Unfortunately it wasn't videoed so maybe I'll perform again in October. Actually I'm performing another set virtually in October. However nothing has changed. I am a computer geek, I prefer it this way. I did do another set in September, people enjoyed it. The other thing on my to do list was designing T shirts. I have done like 46 in two months. Apparently you need hundreds to earn real money. Hopefully I can get better at graphics too, I am learning some new skills.

I am doing it quicker and quicker. My goal was two a week. I have done 16this past week. So will continue this and see where it leads. My strategy is basically throwing shit against the wall and seeing what sticks and

I am about a month behind on book publishing. Not exactly my fault as I am trying to fix a corrupted volume 2 manuscript. Volume 3 wasn't corrupted but maybe I'll do a few days of editing. If I do my partying book will be delayed until November or December. Fuck!

Started my first very short fiction which will be released under a pen name. My other fiction books in the particular genre will be 2-3 times as long. I am doing a very short book to start. If I can tear myself away from the genre I'm doing I'll do short comedy fiction next year.

Not sure if I want to do political comedy fiction. Orange Buffoon is already ridiculous enough. I have no idea what I want to do. Maybe a newsroom spoof in the Buffoon era, that might be fun. I know that I just said no I don't want to do political comedy, but the characters would react to real life events. I imagine that I'll do a book following a candidate but for now the newsroom idea sounds great.
Posted at 01/10/2020 06:38:12 UTC 31 comments

Books, Comedy, Products

Had another set back today but oh well. I am finally republishing my books and my partying book will be selling either this month or next.

I am doing drag comedy at Good Times Comedy Club September 14th, just because I can. No I am not returning to professional comedy, it's just something to do.

I was at a party the other week and people were still wanting me to do comedy. Um I am not a people pleaser. I did try do do a set and the fucking text to speech wouldn't work, no idea why. So people were reading my set on my computer and laughing.

I am thinking of doing disability related videos to promote my books. Problem is I don't like personal brands. I need to find a balance of not getting too high profile but if still promoting my books.

I am too busy to work on animated videos however I expect to work on all sorts of videos after my partying book is published. I may do some second editions but I want to do some fiction first.

Random rant: So many people fake positivity. I wish people can be honest about how miserable they are. I know people fake happiness for therapeutic reasons but I think it's OK to say life is fucked up, because it is. I don't think positivity is productive. I think that people that force themselves to be positive are less likely to make their life better. Although sometimes you can't. I just find it all so fake. Negativity doesn't have to be a bad thing; You can turn it into humour and make people laugh. At least I can, if you get my humour, and if you don't, sucks to be you I guess.

I like making myself laugh and if I make other people laugh, that's a bonus. On the other hand books, shirts and videos will be mainly for other people. They're also assets I'm building. All of my websites are assets too, it'd help if they were cash flowing assets Problem with shirts is I'm a shitty marketer and a crap designer, oh well. I am hoping that my designs will get better and eventually I'll have enough decent ones for a bit of income.
Posted at 02/09/2020 06:22:35 UTC 22 comments

Business, achievements, trance

My internet business is kind of fucked, much more than usual. This isn't covid related, or sales related. I am an extremely crappy salesman. I am reducing software development time to focus more on T shirts and books. Basically software development wasn't working out and something happened to make it totally fucked at this point but I will definitely get back to it eventually. I just feel doing content websites and releasing shirts/books are easier to get up. I am still doing lots of programming in my spare time.

I suddenly feel like writing erotca under a pen name. Obviously I'm going to release the existing books I have written first. I probably would want to write the first book this year.

Little progress on the videos I mentioned last month. It's a problem of getting around to editing images. Hopefully I can get around to it soon.

I feel like I am not successful, but in a few months I'll have two actively selling books and a library of T shirt designs. So that's an achievement.

I'm getting a new communication device with my own software on it. To be honest the project has been fucking frustrating and if I didn't need the software myself because the other software was so shitty I would have given up. The problem is also spending so much time on a project that if you gave up you just wasted years of your life.

People say I do too much blah blah blah. Firstly my strategy is if one project succeeds I'll pour capital in the other projects and keep growing. Secondly how many people have performed comedy overseas, authored books, had a massive software business (over a decade ago), created their own accessibility software, have additional websites in industries they love, have amused thousands of people, hell my ideas have amused hundreds of thousands of people (through someone stealing my ideas), my set was retweeted by Dawn French too, I have interviewed loads of people including a politician, OK now I'm narcissisticly listing (some of) my achievements. What is my point? I am brilliant! I don't always broadcast my successes, even though I am doing that now, I am still leaving some jucy stuff out. I have written software that allows me to do stand up, chair meetings and speak at universities even though I didn't finish high school. I could be more famous, I just choose not to do that. Even though I haven't had as much success as I like, most people haven't done what I have done. Things will turn around.

I went to a trance gig, finally. Only been listening to trance for eight years. It wasn't in Europe but much cheaper. I am not really into any sort of pride but I am glad that I live in New Zealand at this time.
Posted at 06/08/2020 06:46:02 UTC 15 comments

Books, videos, tangents

Fuck, it's July.

I really should get my two books published, I need to finish my second book. I also can make videos now. Typical Thane with Shiny Object Syndrome. I need to published my books, then go hard on videos. Doing just one video first though.

I am going to stop commenting on others' Facebook. People don't understand the things I say and try to debate points I didn't even make. I swear this is happening the majority of the time I comment, it's been like this for months I am probably a terribly communicator. I am also not very tactful or respectful. Well I have shit to do. I just want to get my thoughts out ASAP and move on with my day. Time to stop commenting.

One thing I like about animating videos is I don't have to deal with people, or fucking funding applications. I can't be bothered with either of them. Previously filled out two or three applications, I know this is not a lot. Again, I have shit to do. I don't want to waste time filling in applications when I could be building something. On the other hand, filled in an application, got a few trips to Brisbane. I also don't even like going out of the house, or fucking traffic. Traveling in a van is not productive. Now if I could teleport somewhere, do a set, teleport back right after, that could work. Otherwise going out is just largely unproductive. Releasing productions from the comfort of my bedroom suits me fine I can create brands, I don't want my name attached to most things that I do. I don't like how everything is people oriented. I don't care who's staring in a movie, I just want to know whether it's good. Ignoring the fact that I haven't seen a movie in five years. Again, I have shit to do. I don't like the media, the media usually covers me wrong, so it can fuck off. Getting recognition is completely overrated, I don't understand society's obsession with getting credit, fame, fans. I just want to write productions and put them on screen.. It'll probably still take a fuck lot of time, but most of the time will be spent doing things. I'll also release more comedy this way. I even forgotten that I wrote some scripts. I can't wait to get this pumping!

Clarification, basically the only things I like doing are going to bigger cities or seeing an international musician. Perhaps partying on other occasions. This is mostly fucked due to Covid.

This is unexpectedly full of tangent rants, so let's do another one and hate on the internet in general. Every few months a person gets slammed for saying a stupid thing, or doing stupid/offensive things 10 years ago. The people probably deserve it most of the time. The reason why I refuse to attach my name to businesses is that I know I am an offensive jackass. I am more comfortable controlling entities rather than randomly dealing with boycotts because I offended some group of people. Again I don't need recognition, I am happy doing things from behind the scenes. On the one hand this is not brave but I feel it's the most sensible way. Also many famous people are miserable, and I fully understand why. Many artists are depressed, does them being famous actually help them? Many end up in an early grave. This is a tangent on a tangent. Yes, I am not putting my eggs in one basket then being at the mercy on people on Twitter. Entities and brands are the way to go. At the same time I don't want to invalidate the boycotts. Some people on Twitter are absolute morons just looking to be offended and/or take you out of context. However most of the calling out people on issues have been decent. I am sure you can find some over the top reactions though.
Posted at 02/07/2020 04:24:56 UTC 125 comments

Books, Coronavirus, Puppy

At the beginning of the year I started a partying book. The plan was to go to Sydney and Europe to finish it, obviously that's not going to happen. I am thinking of finishing it in July. I also need to get my other book back up.

Nothing much is happening, people are still posting crap on Facebook. I have decided that people wanting the virus should create their own city and get it, party, do whatever, have a blast. Just don't come back without antibodies. I don't mind if people are anti lock down, but can you stop with the incredibly stupid arguments that do nothing but broadcast to the world that you can't understand extremely basic stuff? If you just don't care whether masses of people get the virus, well that position doesn't display that you're absolutely ignorant of how to process the numbers. I disagree with it but you're less fucking stupid than some people. If you don't like me calling people stupid, I don't care, I should have been calling people stupid all along. I am done with people. Perhaps emotions come into it. Emotions hinder logic. Anyway I'm sick of hearing from these people, they're free to fuck off to an island and get coronavirus. Then they'll probably complain about something else.

A puppy now lives with me part-time. She's at least friendler than the other dog my sister brings over. I don't have to clean up her messes or pay for her, that's suits me. I have the urge to start a disability personal finance blog and I could include tips like if you're disabled (or if you're offended by labels, crippled) and don't want to pay for a pet just get an assistant with a pet, problem solved. I'd also love to do a satirical blog. I already have too many blogs and websites.
Posted at 03/06/2020 08:16:30 UTC 145 comments

Ranting about people and Coronavirus

This fucking pandemic would be more tolerable if people weren't posting the same stupid shit on Facebook. Obesity, car crashes are not infectious diseases. You can't get obesity by going to McDonalds one time and it knocking you off within three weeks, how do people think this is remotely similar? People have a fantasy of separating people who are OK with the virus with the people who don't want it. This is idiotic. Even if you could separate them (you probably can't) they'll be doomed inside for about six months. However if the rest get the virus at the same time that'll fuck the medical system and people couldn't get cancer treatment. More importantly they don't know the long term health effects of it and at least some can get it again. Sorry but this pandemic seems to have disconnected people's brains. Apparently the lock down is working, I hope that the virus is eliminated, which will buy us some time for treatment to be available. It'll probably resurface when our borders open up. By the way to people who say reopen the economy what do you think a up to 5% reduction of country's population will do to the economy? What about the aged care sector? Well there will be less need for rest homes if 20% of their clientele died. Mass death is probably not a good economic stimulant.

I have been more social on Zoom than most times in the past decade, well at least half decade. I don't like going out so it's more convenient to join a zoom meeting.

I am producing a comedy and female vocal trance radio show this month, not sure when it'll air but I guess contact me if you want to know.

Posted at 06/05/2020 04:15:57 UTC 106 comments

Coronavirus, TTS

New Zealand is on lock down because of the fucking coronavirus. I thought that the virus was no big deal at first, obviously I was wrong. I regret not getting sex while I could, I could have gotten some in Sydney but my passport expired. Yes I am ranting about sex. I'm a workahollic nerd; saying at home really doesn't affect me that much as I really don't like going out anyway. Some concerts cancelled, I can't go overseas, no big deal.

Actually the most annoying thing about this fucking virus is Emails from organization asking how I am. Bitch, I am busy and don't have time for your Email. I have also gotten countless Emails from random companies about the virus. If you're not shutting down my service GO AWAY! I don't care what you're doing with your company! Fuck!

While I'm ranting I have no time for idiots. Idiots can fuck off, they're endangering people's lives with their stupid bullshit. Dumb fuckers still don't believe that this virus is that bad. You have to be a special kind of narcissistic fuckwitt to think that you know better than public health experts at this stage. Many people are just fucking stupid! Er I had two hours sleep last night so I am probably extra bitchy. Can you tell? Perhaps you can't.

I did suddenly wanted to do comedy but my gig was cancelled. Going out was probably a really bad idea, though I probably wouldn't have got it anyway. I probably sound like a dumb person on the news. That's OK, at least I know when I am hypocritical and stupid. But seriously there was only about 20 infections in New Zealand at the time, the chances of getting an infection was really really low. I still want to do drag comedy at some stage, just because it'll be fun.

Today I started going through some electronic dance music tutorials. I have been meaning to learn for years. I still have no desire to be famous, I just want to learn how to make electronic dance music, specifically trance. I'd happily DJ in a gay club with hot shirtless guys, that would be pretty cool. Perhaps I'd release music through a stage name or produce music for other artists. I wouldn't mind doing that.

What sucks is I was mainly building event listing software and now all events have been cancelled. There's no point releasing it until this fucking virus is gone.

On the bright side it's a good time to invest in event companies, airlines, or most companies really since stocks have collapsed.

I have almost finished remote text to speech software. This will allow me to transfer live text to speech files through the web so it'll be like I'm speaking to the person. I pretty much only need to test.
Posted at 01/04/2020 06:30:09 UTC 65 comments

Electric Avenue, Partying Book, Websites

I went to Electric Avenue festival, I got more material for my partying book. I was reminded how annoying people are. More people = more annoying people. Though I don't mind dancing with and fist bumps with cute guys. But honestly every five minutes someone would approach me, annoying. I probably have less tolerance since I'm aging, though I didn't have much to begin with. I got in the first row at the Pendulum set

My partying book is at 8,300 words. I accepted a commission based job running a network of 10 websites so I had to stop work on the book while I prepare for that. I'm basically programming automation so maintaining the websites won't take much time at all. I still plan on doing all my other projects and websites. Recently I added a website to my personal portfolio, it's another music oriented website. The network of websites I'm managing is in a niche I'm already in (not music) so hopefully with 10 additional websites I can experiment more to find out what gets the best results.

You probably don't care but it's my blog so fuck off if you don't like it.

Hopefully I'll get to back to writing my new book soon.
Posted at 04/03/2020 05:39:33 UTC 42 comments

Overseas trips, DJing, books, Will and Grace

I delayed this blog because I was going to Sydney and wanted to write about that. I didn't end up going because I had an expired passport. Insurance won't pay out, no surprise. They look for excuses not to pay.

I'm going to Europe in June. I have ordered a new passport so hopefully things go to plan. I was advise not to use Airpoints, which really doesn't make sense to me so I am thinking Vegas/LA next year. Trying to think of a business reason to go back to China too. Preferably after a vaccine is created.

I love creating software and I have created software to DJ, tested it out Saturday, it was barely functional, doing request didn't work, my fault for not testing requests while music was playing. I'll fix that next time. No, I'm not considering a career change, I don't like basing a career on a personal brand, because I say all kinds of crazy shit. I just like creating software. I really want to create a music mixing application and plan to start it soon. If I ever release music it'd be under a stage name, I'd rather produce for a DJ and occasionally join them on trips in the crowd, or manage a gay club. I probably don't have time to go into music professionally. However I am available to DJ for friends' parties and if a gay club offered. Yeah I'd consider doing it, if the guys there were hot LOL! I did general music on Saturday.

My next book is 80% complete. I'm inspired to write other books such as about my short time in comedy and about traveling. Perhaps I'll do one book a year. Self published, probably less professional and with more casual writing. I think this works best for me. I think that I could write a book about sex and also some erotic fiction; I'm completely serious. Though I don't read erotic fiction or any kind of novels so I need to study it. I'd release the sex books under a pen name.

Also Will and Grace is a bit shit this season because Karen has been absent for two episodes; she's the best character in the show in my opinion.
Posted at 19/02/2020 06:58:50 UTC 29 comments

Goals, Christmas, New Year

Did I achieve last year's goals. No. However one of my goals was to launch a concert site and while I didn't do that by I hope to have three sites loosely connected to music soon, and possibly more after so I am claiming victory.

I am still not where I want to be but some of my websites are getting big. As long as I continue to grow my portfolio of sites hopefully things will work out.

I never noticed how weird Christmas is. It's November, let's put up green shit all over the place. What's with Christmas trees? Did Jesus have one? Is cutting down all those trees even environmentally friendly? Christmas is not environmentally friendly, there's a fuck load of waste and rubbish. Giving cash reduces rubbish, just saying!

Why are people saying happy new year? It's happy new fucking decade! Stop underselling the event. Celebrating time also seems like nonsense but I don't care as long as I can get shit faced!
Posted at 02/01/2020 03:27:39 UTC 1070 comments

Carly Rae Jenpsen, Festivals, Music websites

I went to a small town for a multi day event. I hate small towns with a passion. The accessibility is usually shit, I also don't like smaller populations. I can't stand small towns. The event was OK.

Fucking didn't get on my flight to Christchurch because it was windy in Wellington. Fuck that, they should have been more prepared. It's not like it's a rare occurrence. Windy in Wellington, happens all the time. It's rare if it's not windy. No reason why I couldn't have gotten on the flight. Fucking health and safety crap. I had to go to Auckland from Wellington then Auckland to Christchurch. Delayed by four hours. What a bastard.

I am not a fan of small towns, or Wellington, or Wellington airport. Worse airport in New Zealand!

I go to Wellington too much. It's too small of a city for me to want to go there often. I think it has beautiful buildings but I'm over constantly going there.

I was sick of going to Auckland at one stage too. When I do too much of something or see someone too often I just get sick of them. It's been like that all of my life.

I went to Carly Rae Jenpsen in Auckland, she was better than expected. Upstairs but manage to get decent enough photos by going around the side.

I am going to finally use my Airpoints to go to Amsterdam next year. I am going to some trance festivals including going to one in Sydney. I just thought why not? I have never been to a trance specific festival and it's my favourite type of genre. I like vocal trance most of all.

I am finally starting to launch music sites. Turns out my own software is buggy and I forgot to program some key features. So I am doing a lot of fixing. I haven't released it commercially yet. That's something I need to do. I plan to launch international event sites, but will get local sites up first.
Posted at 22/12/2019 02:58:56 UTC 17 comments

U2, Shawn Mendes

Friday I went to U2, Mt Smart Stadium staff are a bit paranoid frankly. They asked me to stop driving completely unnecessarily when I was already going somewhere. My view was fairly good from a segregated seat. I enjoyed Noel Gallagher. U2 were good.

Saturday I went to Shawn Mendes. I almost didn't go because of all of the screaming girls at these things but when U2 was playing I thought that it was more economical to go to both. I could better justify going because of economies of scale. Nobody took me to my seat and didn't know where it was so I just went on the floor up the front. I had no idea if I was supposed to be there but nobody complained. I was a bit off to the side but it wasn't crowded. Shawn saw me and gave me a peace sign, then patted me on the arm later. He came up to me twice. It was more fun than being at home. I wish I had video, but got a guitar pick, I don't know if it was Shawn's. I also forgot that I specifically wanted to be upstairs for this concert, to avoid crazy girls, sometimes my memory sucks, oh well, it worked out great!

I enjoyed Shawn's concert more because I was at the front and he came up to me, I also like collecting things from concerts.

Not having video is a fucking bitch but maybe I can look back on these blogs, and laugh at my own jokes. I say if you don't laugh at your own jokes you probably aren't funny!

Sunday I am at the airport for about four hours, just writing blogs, can't be fucked with WiFi. Was on WiFi at hotel but couldn't be bothered with Email or Facebook, that was pretty much off the grid when it comes to me, OK? Wrote most of some starter articles for a new partying product site I'm developing. Hopefully that's vague enough so fuckers don't steal my idea.
Posted at 11/11/2019 05:10:32 UTC 11 comments

Arts Access Awards, business

I don't know why I continue these blogs. I am busy and really can't be fucked. So talking about myself is burdensome. I am not a fucking narcissist hahaha.

Last month I hosted the Arts Access Awards; it was the best event I've hosted all year; it also was only event I hosted all year. However seriously it was a top event of my performing life, well I can't really call it a career. I totally can do corporate gigs. Not that I have any plans to do so. Performing is a skill in my back pocket in case everything goes to shit.

And everything is going to shit, I am not happy with my lack of financial success, I haven't been for the past 5 years. I am not happy that I haven't sorted eye tracking yet. I am happy with the websites I've created, I've just got to make them profitable. I still believe that I'm going in the right direction. However I don't feel successful, at least financially.

I have done so much in my life like performing overseas, performing in Parliament, wrote a book series, done speeches in Universities, appeared in a music video, went to like a billion concerts, danced with Anastacia. I've done things I don't wish to take credit for, I know you're shocked. I've made thousands of people laughed. Have I lead a great life? Sure. Do I feel successful? Not really. However life can always be tweaked. I believe that I can be successful.

I am successful in some ways. However I can do better. Some of my problems are self inflicted.
Posted at 03/10/2019 21:58:21 UTC 14 comments

Whining comedians

This month I'm randomly ranting about comedians. I am sick of their whining about political correctness. Good comedy in my opinion courage but comedians whining about people not liking their jokes is not courageous, it's pathetic.

Every industry has to adapt, why would comedy be different? You cannot make fun of the same minorities you could 20 years ago, and that's probably a good thing. If you do and you get booed or blacklisted that's on you.

Smart comedians will just adapt.

I'm not the biggest fan of gate keepers and some probably go too far. If you don't want to deal with them you could put on your own shows and/or start your own open mic.

Take the initiative instead of whining. If there's a market for your stuff you will succeed if not sorry people don't have to embrace your humour.

If you make fun of the powerful this wouldn't be so much of a problem. If you do the opposite then yes you're going to get shit.

You CAN control your jokes, you CANNOT control people's reaction to them. Instead of complaining endlessly why don't you modify your act?

If you're a rich comedian and complain, fuck you! I give no shits about you. You have enough of a following to do your own thing.

I have millions of dollars and annoyed people don't like my joke about transgendered people. Yes, fuck you!

If you're a poorer comedian, you just have to deal with modern society's expectations. It doesn't have to be a negative, try new things, refine. Perhaps you'll hit gold!

If you really don't like today's culture by all means find a way to develop your own following. I don't care.

Comedy regularly offends people and that's ok. Comedians should push boundaries but there's possible risks of doing so.

If you want a safe space to tell jokes, there's nothing stopping you from creating one.

Also some may consider me a whining (ex) comedian about other things, oh well. You're right and I don't care. However rich comedians complaining about audiences does genuinely fuck me off!
Posted at 04/09/2019 04:00:30 UTC 13 comments

Wellington, content sites, Rich rant

Went to Wellington for a meeting. Stayed at a hotel with crappy access. There was steps to the bathroom. Serious what the fuck? Meeting was scheduled when an international rugby match was on, that was probably a bad idea.

I have noticed that I like building content sites more than programming. I always seem to work extra on my content days. I am focusing on 3-4 industries, which frankly is a cut-down for me.

To people who insist you have to do one thing to be successful.
Steve Jobs wasn't really successful until he did iPhones, iTunes. He didn't just do Macs.
Amazon didn't make a profit for years and years and the company now has defense contracts, cloud services, wholefoods. It is not just one thing.
Richard Branson had multiple things.
Rich people are also rich largely because they're tight asses and do a lot of investing. Many rich people are complete cheapskates. I know this from YouTube videos and dating a guy from a wealthy family. It's not really to do with doing one thing and getting good at it, it's more financial strategy. There's a reason why half of lottery winners go broke.

Even if most rich people do one thing, they have other investments too.

While I'm not great at sticking to one thing, I've done some stuff for years and sooner or later some will be successful. I've launched about 6 websites this year and a few more are planned. This is different from previous years where I just did programming. I am getting more sites up and am feeling great. Some sites are small or can be semi automated.
Posted at 01/08/2019 04:33:05 UTC 12 comments


Honestly I feel disturbed, and not in a good way. Recently I learned that people with disabilities are denied medical care that others get. I read about how beds are inaccessible in Australia so people don't women don't get appropriate examinations. Apparently denial of care happens in NZ but people and articles aren't good at providing credible sources so I have to do more research into this. If you have particular examples please message me. I have discovered other disturbing facts about disability and the medical industry but I don't really feel like typing horrible events here, at least about other people.

This makes me wonder if am I a bad disability advocate. I often wonder the same thing about gay rights, considering I do more disability work.

Perhaps blaming yourself for systematic issues is a bit narcissistic. I also don't like to refer to myself as a advocate frankly. However it's clear to me that there's critical issues that need resolving and people need to do more and this includes myself.

However I am also happy continuing doing other stuff. It is about balance though, that balance is out of sync currently.

I do view myself best suited to providing strategic advice and delegation. Mainly because I like to focus on multiple things at once. I'll also try to create more disability content for my network of sites.

Perhaps this is self serving however I truly believe that growing a strong network would help the entity advocate in the long run.

NGOs are apolitical mostly and in my opinion they screw themselves by doing this. Political organizations also frankly play it too safe.

I believe that freeing yourself of maximum restrictions is the only way to do anything. Sometimes this means freeing yourselves from the group think in the disability community. However other times it's worthwhile to listen, research and change your mind.
Posted at 03/07/2019 04:17:19 UTC 7 comments

Broods, Angerfist, Life

Saw Broods again, couldn't understand a word they said but good to have a night out with a friend.

Saw Angerfist, loved it. Took a picture with him. Well he wears a mask so I assume he's a he. I also assume he was actually there and not some random local wearing an Angerfist mask. I'm joking of course!

I launched a music themed website, finally and probably will launch a few more in this area. I probably should just mainly focus on passion niches going forward. Knowing me I will probably just continue doing random shit but that's ok, something will pay off eventually. As long as I am slightly more focused on a few passion niches and getting stuff out there I will be happy.

The good thing about passion niches is you can do what you love as a business. I have always wanted to do concert reviews but unfortunately I do too many things so that hasn't happened yet but hopefully I can sort this eventually.

A problem with traveling for business is you have to take an assistant for a person like me. This adds up over time. Also considering airpoints, I could have gone on a free overseas trip already but of course I'm a cripple so I have to pay for two people. This also fucks me for conferences etc. So I have to do better at earning airpoints and do more to structure business around traveling.

I did get the eye tracking API working with my own accessibility software but I still have to assess how accurate it is and need to sort out a switching system first. Unfortunately I'm having issues.

Aside from that I'm working on something to semi automate Twitter usage and something to check statistics for multiple affiliate programs in one place. Nobody cares but this is my blog so I will write what I like.

I could write about this new guy I am seeing but I am happily single so can't do that. Normal people also talk about their offspring, don't have those and I am thankful, and I would probably make a disastrous dad. I get sick of people if I spend too much time with them. People post about their pets. I wanted a new dog but said to myself they cost money.

People regard me as cheap but really I just know how to hyper focus my spending on things that make me happy. I have to pay double for airfares anyway so yes I'm going to be even cheaper. Plus there's lost productivity since I operate the computer slowly. I need to get better about investing so money works for me. The same goes for websites, I really need to make them work for me better.
Posted at 05/06/2019 06:58:07 UTC 6 comments

Software and music projects

Currently frustrated, am coding too much, need to get more things up. Though have launched about 4 sites this year and have a few more coming up. I should have more fun which is not related to getting sites up, I am super busy and need to have more fun.

I deeply regret not using OpenCV for eye tracking development, I probably could have completed that years ago. I'll probably revisit it soon.

I badly need a new computer, but accessibility software sucks so I am forced to create my own. Hopefully that's nearly complete.

I acquired publishing rights to my books. I don't really have time to get that sorted but will anyway. I really wanted to delegate that income stream. On the bright side I'll have an additional asset.

I don't really do anything other than coding and web development. I wish that I could travel more, and go clubbing. Though I can't really be fucked going out, that's half the reason I quit comedy. So I need to connect clubbing to my business somehow. More on this in future blogs.

Comedy was a business, but I primarily liked writing the jokes. I liked performing at the time but I just couldn't get myself to want to do it constantly. I am too use to my own company. Interacting with people can be exhausting and going out can be burdensome if you'd rather spend time writing software. I don't really want to go to concerts nowadays. Though I can't find a decent gig in Auckland. I could have gone to Boyzone, but they suck. Shawn Mendes, I am sick of the screaming fans. I don't want to spend money on someone I've seen before, that rules out half of the music industry. I liked going to Auckland occasionally, but I haven't been motivated to do that recently.

I need a music role that would allow me to dip in and out whenever I want. I have something in mind but can't do it without massive capital.

On a positive note I am slowly phasing in music projects, but I need to create an income stream for these to build that capital. Hopefully this works out.

I have problems with people stealing my ideas, so I could be more reserved about what I give away.

So key focuses for the immediate future is getting self publishing sorted, getting one or two music sites going and fine tuning technology to have sites update at least semi automatically. Oh hopefully eye tracking with an API is a few weeks away!
Posted at 03/05/2019 05:33:39 UTC 6 comments

Wellington, Work, Running as a candidate

OK I haven't done this in a while. You're lucky I am blogging. I have shit to do.

Basically did nothing except went to Wellington last weekend. Fucking booking site didn't pass on the fact I needed an accessible room. Fucking incompetent. My flight home was late. Apparently it's perfectly acceptable to be late if you are in the medical, transport or aviation industry. I have shit to do!

I still haven't wound down programming at work. I may do that soon. I am not inspired to do programming anymore. I want to launch more websites. I am currently doing a site in a passion niche. I am probably going to create a game around the niche, but that would require more programming. Programming isn't really the problem, I am just uninspired to start new projects and like doing content sites. I think I can do a game. I started a game interface seven years ago but never completed it. I have a ton of things like this. I do need to do a map interface. That is going to be fucking long winded, created one before. Oh well, gives me something to work on in my spare time instead of being frustrated because I can't pick something to do.

I currently have two things I do in my spare time. (This is different from regular work time.) SEO research software and a another passion niche. I need to do less of the first because I am neglecting stuff I really want to do.

This doesn't contain much humour but whatever. Someone will only steal my jokes anyway!

Someone recently suggested I run as a candidate, again. People like to connect with people, I cannot talk. I don't see that happening. Also if there are debates I am fucked. I know that I am good, but it's probably impossible for me to create software that I can use to debate. Many people have suggested I run, some were probably being sarcastic. I also frankly like my job, yes I just finished bitching about how bored and uninspired I am. I have complete freedom to go anywhere I want, say anything I want. Especially considering I completely avoid attaching personal brands to businesses. In public life I would probably be asked to apologize every 5 minutes, and be asked to apologize again when I say fuck off I'm not apologizing. I am in the industries I want to be in all because I create sites for those industries. Granted I need to be better at making sites successful instead of constantly programming. Being in office sounds like a nightmare, I do need to improve my life, but that isn't how I would do it.
Posted at 04/04/2019 03:26:07 UTC 9 comments

Slash, Fatboy Slim, Lilly Allen, Auckland, The Prodigy, Conclusions

Fuck, I have been to so many concerts recently I am having trouble remembering them all.

First, Slash in Auckland. I didn't really want to go but the event with All Saints was cancelled and the flights and accommodation were already booked, the music was OK. The fucking accommodation was going to put us upstairs the first night so we stayed elsewhere the first night. I got back Monday.

Wednesday I went to Fatboy Slim. There was a particularly annoying blond woman trying to hold my hand all night. That's not the way I like to dance. Fuck off! The only way that I could stop her was shoving my hands in my back rest. Another blond was staring at me for some reason. Another woman said that she hoped someone was helping me, well she can fuck off too I am not fucking hopeless. And people wonder why I spend all day on a computer! Despite this it was one of the best concerts I have been to. They let me backstage when Fatboy Slim came on, which looking back has segregation issues but I was just hoping to meet Fatboy Slim, and I did. So that was fucking awesome. He tried to read my board but only got a few letters. Points for trying though. I was given a T shirt too. Excellent!

Friday I went to Auckland again.

I can't see me going to Auckland as much this year. I have been to 50 concerts, there's also nobody coming that I want to see. There's a few in Christchurch I am going to. I have got to go to Wellington twice this year which frankly is worse because I like cities with bigger populations. Wellington is just a hilly version of Christchurch. Some nice buildings though. I mainly go to Wellington because I am obligated to. I'll go to Auckland again when someone decent comes along. I am getting sick of being away from my main computer.

Saturday I went to Lilly Allen. I managed to get in the second row. It was a good view when people weren't in my way. Some guys additionally went in front of me for the last song however the woman beside me told them to go elsewhere. The first act looked like she was in an orange jump suit. Issue was a great concert!

Wednesday I saw The Prodigy, good music. Terrible venue! They fucking segregated me. I have been in hard rock mosh pits before so they can fuck off with their namby pamby conservative discriminatory crap. They restricted my access because I have a disability. Fuck them!

Saturday I went home.

Conclusion: If I want to dance in the crowd perhaps pop music is best. Although I don't really like being around screaming silly fans. Perhaps D&B/house/trance at clubs is a happy medium. I could be a DJ, but hate personal brands, I prefer to stay the background. My dream would be to manage a band and travel around with them. Alternatively own a club. Neither is something I can do until I get major cash flow.

Wrote 5244 words while away. Most was content for websites. Hope that they help with cash flow eventually!
Posted at 07/02/2019 02:32:30 UTC 6 comments

2019 plans, new years eve

I think that I did fuck all since my last blog entry. Happy 2019 or fuck 2019 depending on your mood. My goals are to continue developing SEO analysis and niche research software and make a fuck ton of money with the results. The first phase is completed but need to improve it and finish the niche research system. I expect this to be ready in a month. I need to spend less time programming and more creating content sites, this is not going terribly well but hopefully I can do this in March. I need computer upgrades, and I want a disco light system for my room eventually. Well that and a wall TV. I was just given a TV and I grateful for that but I have a vision of a few screens me around plus a wall TV, you have to work towards something, right? I'm crap at making money but need to change it this year. I say that every year but late last year I acquired some premium SEO courses and education. Hopefully I can put these to good use and get some capital to invest. I hopefully have just about finished an eye tracking system. It's not the system I originally wanted but will hopefully do for now. I also want to launch Windows programs and do more marketing of my web products. I want to launch a (better) clothing website with funny T shirts. Hopefully I'll get around to launching a music site this year too. I wanted a production company but that will have to wait until capital starts flowing in, whenever the fuck that is. I am crap with making money because I focus on building many types of software instead of getting things out to the world but the SEO software will help me do that. Oh I went out on new years. Fucking chair malfunctioned. This head gear is a piece of shit, needs replacing. First bar I went to it was completely dead in the dance area, everybody was in the smoking area. So went to Mickey Finns. Then went to Rock Pool which was more to my and/or I was piss drunk because I enjoyed it much more. I really don't like bars with cover bands. I find that boring. It's always the same songs that you hear every time.
Posted at 23/01/2019 02:15:46 UTC 8 comments

Catherine Tate, Meeting, Shania Twain, SEO

I went to Catherine Tate, sometime in the past. It was a very funny show but thought that the Bovvered sketch could have been better. I also thought that the videos in between sketches were a bit shit.

Before that (or after) I went to a disability issues meeting. I like to be as productive as possible so I frequently blog when I am away from my programming computer. Problem was I was blogging about how some people don't go to disability meetings because they think that they are talk fests. I didn't notice that the person taking the meeting was reading my screen. By the way always ask before you do that! If you don't it's your problem as far as I am concerned. Luckily he thought that what I was writing was interesting and shared it with the group. As far as the meeting itself, honestly I don't consider spending time on the history of the New Zealand Disability Strategy a productive use of time. I also question the usefulness of discussing things at a table and leaving 90% of what's discussed there without any action. Well OK, that is not really useful. Sorry! Maybe come up with a different model for meetings.

Tuesday I went to Auckland to see Shania Twain, the concert was Wednesday, I didn't want to come early but it worked out great.

Concert was pretty good. First act was OK. He tried to be funny, keyword tried. People should pay me to write jokes. Shania had good effects.

Thursday I am going home. Probably will post this today.

My move towards doing more SEO is progressing. I am helping top SEOs and in exchange I get to learn from them. So that is cool. Trouble is I do too much programming to focus on ranking stuff in search engines. I'll cut back programming next year and try to focus more on ranking sites. Apparently small sites still work under specific conditions so maybe I will invest in those plus some bigger ones after my own SEO software is running.

90% of the SEO industry really doesn't know what the fuck they're doing. They either build shitty backlinks or think backlinks are the devil. You can rank sites without backlinks but you can do it more effectively with backlinks. I'm not calling people in the Good Content Club idiots, but I think that there are more efficient ways of ranking sites. If some of them make money by ranking the specific types of websites that perform under those conditions, good for them. Some SEOs don't know basic terms for fuck sakes and think that SEO is different than CRO, last decade that may have been correct but that is just an utterly delusional attitude at this point. This industry is full of complete idiots. It's like working in economics or politics!

If you do SEO for me and do shitty backlinks I'll fire you. You can fuck off and do that for people who don't have a clue about SEO. In my opinion shitty backlinks are not entirely worthless depending on the niche but could get your website flagged for review and don't have as much power as high quality backlinks. If people are going to work for me I expect my instructions followed to the letter.
Posted at 20/12/2018 04:56:54 UTC 0 comments

Dunedin, Taylor Swift,, Sleeping

A few weeks ago I went to Dunedin. I don't particularly like going to small towns but many of the things I attended I enjoyed.

Apparently comedians are meant to enjoy going to small towns. I need high buildings and a large population for a city to be enjoyable. That part of comedy wasn't going to sync with me. Random rant about comedy over. Since leaving stand up comedy I have learned some people perform to make themselves feel better. I however like being cynical. It's the same reason that some people constantly post positive crap on Facebook, they're just trying to cheer themselves up. I am very happy being bitter and don't need to pretend to be something I not. The world is beyond fucked.

Thursday I went to Auckland. The trip pretty much sucked apart from seeing Taylor Swift. It was good to spend more time on business blogs though.

Friday was the concert and it was surprisingly fucking awesome. All three performers were good. (CharliXCX and Broods also performed, though mostly couldn't understand a word the second band said) I particularly liked the light show from Taylor Swift which included lights on people's arm band syncing to the music, it looked awesome.

Replaced my third coffee of the day with hot chocolate, now I don't get insomnia as much even after typing for 6-8 hours. Though spent at least two hours listening to music before bed. Maybe I should test that volume of typing with one hour of music time but probably won't be soon.
Posted at 12/11/2018 02:45:14 UTC 0 comments

Rants, SEO and Cher

Yes my monthly blog is late, I don't care. I have better things to do than to write about my life most weeks. Shock horror I'm not a narcissist that takes every opportunity to write about himself. You are lucky I bother to post crap on Facebook, or unlucky if you dislike my crap.

My friend requests are back to public. I have hidden my gender and display public "interested in men" to see if I can attract male spam bots. So far, nothing. I suppose that is a better consequence of hiding my gender from public but does say that blackhats have shitty algorthms that do not account for gays.

Conclusion: Received a friend request from a female bot, my theory didn't work. If they get too annoying I'm restricting friend requests again.

Speaking of blackhats. I have decided to focus more on SEO. (search engine optimization) I am not going blackhat but I am beginning to see blackhat SEO as a way to trick Google, experimenting more seems like a fun challenge and I'll probably dabble with it from time to time. I won't do anything illegal. However experimenting is worthwhile, I am just being a computer scientist. I don't really care about what hat I am wearing as long as I don't break any laws.

Most of my stuff will continue to be whitehat. Blackhat stuff is mostly useful for turn and burn stuff which I do not do. However recently I discovered evidence based SEO and that's interesting to me. If I can earn money with these experiments that's also good. I prefer long term assets but turn and burn could be useful for experiments. Just call me a mad computer scientist.

I am also creating SEO tools which I expect to use in a few months.

Last Wednesday I went to Sydney. Had some Jack Daniels samples at Duty Free, because I could. Sydney took a long time to get my wheelchair. Turns out we booked a non wheelchair friendly place, regulations in Australia must be crap. Apparently I had to be upgraded to the Deluxe room. If this is the Deluxe room I would hate to see what their regular rooms look like.

Thursday was the Cher concert. She gets a C for too many Costume Changes. I didn't like the way she performed Strong Enough. She didn't perform some of the songs I liked like You Haven't Seen The Last Of Me and This Is A Song For The Lonely. Definitely a C. Just call me a concert snob. I did stand far for almost the entire time though with my stand up wheelchair.

Friday I am spending most of the day writing blogs.

Saturday I am going home.

On the planes I blogged and watched Westside. The scheduling fucked up and my PVR didn't record half the episodes so it was good to watch it. TV selection otherwise has gone downhill.

Also it's totally fucking stupid having Antarctic scenery on the screens in our NEW ZEALAND national airline. What the fuck?

I probably should make more of a effort to have Grindr when I go to Australia.
Posted at 21/10/2018 03:37:40 UTC 3 comments

Pink, Bob Dylan, Concert, Business, Idea

It is Wednesday before I post this. I lead an exciting life. Just had some meetings since last time I blogged then going to a Pink concert tonight, second time seeing her. In Auckland. The flight attendant said that he knew how important my computer was to me. I am glad that I have a reputation as a computer geek. That wasn't sarcasm. I am a proud nerd.

Also saw Bob Dylan in Christchurch. My life is exciting comment seems less sarcastic now. For most of the show I couldn't tell where he was. It could have done with some screens. The mic was at the piano and you couldn't see it.

Business wise, still pretty fucked. One site is now receiving Google traffic. I need to get Google traffic on more sites and turn them into true assets. I have started my yearly half day holidays and planning to spend some of my holiday time developing sites. I am a geek with nothing else to do! I have no interest in seeking a partner, well at least not one that requires me to actually spend time with them, beyond the bedroom. I don't currently have someone suitable. So I guess my sites can do with my spare time. Again, total geek. #sorrynotsorry why am I putting hashtags in a blog?

The Pink concert was good. I didn't enjoy her covers, she has of own music. The DJ before her was crap. First band I didn't see much of, and that was fine. Was a bitch not getting General Admission tickets. I moved by the door before her last song but she was flying around the room for it so that was probably a mistake. Sister thought that she sounded better in Sydney. It all still a great concert with awesome effects. Great trip overall.

I almost want to try how the effects would work with stand up comedy. Perhaps once I am crazy rich from websites.
Posted at 06/09/2018 04:05:44 UTC 28424 comments

Projects and speaking

For the past two months I have worked on integrating Print-On-Demand abilities into my event listing software and ecommerce software. Nearly fucking done, took much longer than expected. I can move on soon. Next I need to conquer social media automation, SMS APIs, and advertising APIs. Code for the first two is mostly complete. I should have some great products to use and to sell. I'm a crap seller but have learned some new techniques recently, fingers crossed! Was going to take some time off in August (half days) but I am busy so I can leave it until September, right prick for my spare time projects though.

Monday I spoke at Canterbury University, I love doing speeches. I'm going to turn my speech into an article for my disability site, even though Google still seems to hate that particular site for some reason. I will still try to improve content until things start to rank. I've started doing articles for my event listing software, plus I'm doing content for another set of sites, I am playing the long game. Hmmmm I want it shorter though.

I am going to take three months to do passion projects for half days as my holidays then with any luck I'll generate some income from passion projects to justify spending part time on them.

This may be boring but I don't lead an exciting life so fuck off if you don't like my rants.

Hopefully to FINALLY put my accessibility software to practical use later this month. Apparently I should work on releasing my text to speech queuing system too as some people don't have such software.
Posted at 05/08/2018 04:39:35 UTC 0 comments

Music video, projects, porn stars, YoutTubers

Another one of these, fuck.

Filmed a music video, not mine obviously. Though I could be a musician but I am not right now. Filming a music video was something on my to do list, was it a new years goal? Probably not, but let's say it was and I achieved it! Horray! Let's just ditch all the other goals because I have achieved fuck all of them. I can always put some back in. So I have achieved my only goal. Yipee! And people say you can't make your own reality! I say as long as you say you're doing it, it's ok!

Projects are dragging on and I want to do more passion projects. Hopefully I can finish off the boring crap in July and I can move on. The projects started off as passion projects but I'm sick of them, I want to move on. I have a bad case of shiny object syndrome but I view it as building things up. Surely more assets are a good thing. However I know what I want to focus on in future, but I need to finish current projects. I am hoping one of these projects will help me increase the profits from my comedy T shirts and that may help my production company. I think long-term.

I am following porn stars on Twitter, should I be admitting this? I don't care anymore. It's interesting, they tweet about how they want a relationship, though I guess that is what people do. Apparently they enjoy their job because they don't have to worry about STDs etc. I was told it was difficult to film but many say it's a good experience. Some have thousands of followers, some have fan accounts that actually seem crazy obsessed, many stars will retweet their fan accounts. I am finding this world fascinating. I am trying to grow a following by being one of the first to reply to pictures etc. Yeah I'll probably stop soon and try a different approach as growth has been slower the last few days.

Unrelated rant. Can't stand YouTubers that say guys, literally or actually every ten seconds. They literally annoy me and it's literally like nails on a blackboard. I was literally told repetition is a bad writing practice. I literally try to not do it anymore. See how fucking annoying it is? I should probably stop clicking on their videos.
Posted at 01/07/2018 00:54:47 UTC 0 comments

Richard Dawkins, business, sex

Since last blogging I went to a speech by Richard Dawkins, rather boring beginning but it was OK from the middle onwards. He was entertaining but extremely dreary at the beginning. I know he's not a entertainer, well hopefully. Presentation was still good, glad I went.

I follow more business people on YouTube, some appear to be assholes but some are OK. I followed someone because he said he does business to get laid, which I can totally relate but apparently socialism is evil, fuck the government, fuck paying taxes blah blah blah. You get those types in business I guess. Following business people helps you spot their tactics. Like "I am doing a webinar", but it's pre recorded and the person probably isn't doing the chat. What a bunch of crap. why pretend you're live when you're not. I also hate people who delay telling me the price and instead play a sales game. Give me the information or fuck off! I do not buy from people who do that shit.

I also watched a ton of drop shipping videos. Sounds difficult if you need to fuck around with ringing your bank to start, would be OK if you can talk. I'm doing too much to consider drop shipping, I'll stick to programming, print on demand and affiliate programs. Also you can't automate drop shipping, I like automation. Some people use virtual assistants to do it. Maybe I'll dabble in it sometime but getting other projects up is a priority.

I was reading a blog post and it says the disability community needs to talk about sex more. If it would increase the people who are willing to have sex with us I'll be all for it, but I don't think it would. A lot of disability advocacy is saying things in an echo chamber. I have previously written about sex many times and will probably start an anonymous blog at some point. Though for others feel free to write about sex but I am just skeptical how helpful it will be as the programming of society is fucked.
Posted at 03/06/2018 04:30:22 UTC 0 comments
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